"God uses conflict to reveal our idols"
The Peacemaking Church, Small Group Bible Study-The Peacemaker: A Biblical Guide to Resolving Personal Conflict by Ken Sande
"What causes fights and quarrels among you? Don't they come from your desires that battle within in you?" -James 4:1
Our church is currently doing a bible study on resolving personal conflict in a biblical way. Well, let me tell you this was my first visit (I missed the first 2 sessions) and I was FLOORED! Oh my dear Father not only loved me and answered my prayers but quickly convicted me with a loving hand! This particular session (3) was focused on helping to reveal your idols and that conflict arises to help you see these idols.
I've been asking the Lord why my dear husband and I are at odds with certain issues---and He answered at the perfect time (when I was ready to hear it and to see it)--I have made these issues into idols. I have taken two issues in particular and have turned them from a desire into a demand and am now being judgmental because I am not receiving my desired answer/result.
I'll tell you my two heart's desires are to have another child and to homeschool again. Right now my husband has said no to these two things. Does this mean he is wrong? Does this mean I am wrong? The answers to both of these questions are no. However, I have to trust my husband as being head of our household and leave it at the Lord's feet. I am wrong for persisting and then thinking he is wrong for not agreeing with me. I am wrong for trying to find scripture to judge him with and justify me. Please understand this is my particular situation and my heart's attitude toward this situation and what the Lord is working in me--it is not so much the desire's themselves. I would love to have another child and I do believe our dear Father can provide the finances for this and yes, I do feel like homeschooling would be better for our boys but I also know that God is control and He needs my obedience and my trust. My husband loves the Lord and I know God will let him know what is right for our family.
I have taken my desires and turned them into idols. I have asked God for them and instead of simply asking with a grateful heart and waiting I have said "let me help you Lord" in return truly saying I don't trust Him and (how awful to think) my actions saying I can do it better. Can you see how convicting this one class was?!
I love the Lord! In my selfishness, He has still blessed my family, my marriage, our finances. He has placed the boys in great classes and allowed us a chance to pray for classmates and possibly even be able to witness to some and their parents. You don't know what God sees and what He knows needs to happen. One moment in your life could be life changing in anothers. Where would we be now if Abraham hadn't been obedient in that one moment to the Lord? What if he had listened to the doubt and fear in his mind? What if he had listened to the others who had disagreed with the plans? What would have happened if he hadn't been obedient and trusted?
Where are you now? Do you have conflicts? Maybe this might be the time to step back and ask the Lord to show you if you have idols or the root of a situation. He is faithful-so very, very faithful! He will bring you through the fire and be glorified by it!
God bless you!
"May God use your lifestyle of reconciliation, your family's peace and your church's increasing unity to draw many people to the Prince of Peace, our Lord Jesus Christ" -Ken Sande