this year...

So we took the plunge this year...right into public school. We are nearing the end of the 4th week and you know what..it's been good. The boys are thriving and by God's precious grace, they are doing wonderfully in their classes. They have been become ridiculously aware of how awful people speak but the blessing is that they are turned off by it and are choosing to sit in different places, move to different groups, etc. After asking about where they were sitting at lunch time (I remember those days, where to sit, who to sit with, are they sitting alone...) our oldest said he had been sitting at different tables but the one he had sat at that particular day he wasn't going to sit at again. And the best part- he said a girl from church was sitting at the table behind him and she called to him saying, "Malcolm, God doesn't want you sitting at that table." Blessed this mama's heart.

I'm not going to lie. I miss them. I miss homeschooling. I miss going to co-ops. But I am thankful for every minute we have had with them. I am thankful they have been home as long as they have been because they have awesome relationships with each other, including with the little ones. I am thankful they have manners and good attitudes, for the most part, and that hubby and I can call them out on it when they don't. And despite my initial ideas about what I thought our life would look like now, I still help with school work and we still talk.

I love to see our boys flourishing in their excitement to be learning new things, playing football, making new friends, playing instruments. There are great opportunities in our school district, especially for our oldest right now and his love for technology. And I am beginning to see where our 10 year old has giftings...he is loving orchestra. Mal loves American Civics and Tech Ed and Len loves his honors English class. Their teachers are excited about what they are teaching-what a gift!

So my thoughts on homeschooling, public school, and Christian school...pray...God is faithful. I have been caught up in "this is what you should do only" and yes, God has absolutes and we are not to veer from that, but with school and our family, truly this is what is best for us right now. It came to a point this summer that we were swimming ferociously against the tide in our own strength and reality sunk in. And then there was a talk and tears and prayer...and peace. Ideally, in my world, we would be homeschooling and have lots of babies and live on a farm...but there are six other people involved in my dream...so it's not just my dream to have.

God is good always. He knows our hearts and the plans and paths He has for each of us. So my dream is for His will and not my own, continually laying my heart down before Him, trusting Him, loving Him, knowing His plans are SOOOO much better than mine. Praying all of our dreams are inline with His. He loves my husband and my kids way more than I could even imagine...and me too :) So as He is working on my heart, He is doing the same for each of them and working out what He has to. And He is faithful. As Scott and I commit our lives and our children's lives to the Lord, I know with the sweetest of trust that He will give us wisdom in raising these young men He has entrusted into our care. And on the off days...His grace is sufficient.

This evening I reminded one our sweet ones who was in tears, struggling with selfishness, His mercies are new every morning...oh, how this mama knows this...
Thankful for His mercies and grace...and His faithfulness.

Therefore do not throw away your confidence, which has a great reward. For you have need of endurance, so that when you have done the will of God you may receive what is promised.

Hebrews 10:35-36 ESV