art, family and creating...

Photos from this Mother's Day visit to the Chrysler Museum 

The last few months, possibly six already, I have been slowly embracing that idea that it's ok to feed my desire to create. All the way up through high school I did art. I was even accepted to a prominent art school in New York but because of a couple factors (and my lack of patience) I decided to go to school for culinary arts instead. Despite how that college season of life turned out (not so good), God used it for His glory as the ashes were turned to beauty. The Lord took this broken girl and blessed me with a God-loving husband; a man who made me feel loved, special and worthy. He then blessed us with a son and a few months later my new life in Him. A year later, quite pregnant with our second, He called to my heart and I wanted to publicly confess my precious belief and need for Jesus, my Savior. I was baptized at that moment and sobbed (it was quite comical at the fear in the pastor's face at this sobbing pregnant mama lol.) The story, His story, slowly unfolds from there on, like layers of a sweet onion being peeled. This is pretty much reflected in this blog. For the most part this is why I wanted to start this. I wanted an outlet. Now, truth be told, I had some sort of high hopes and dreams of having one of "those blogs"; something that would be famous, insightful, money generating, fabulous photos, exquisite words. Oh how patient God is with me. Little did I know, God would use this blog instead for so much more. Blogging has allowed me to journal, to see God's workings in my heart, to help me see my heart (always helps to see your thoughts written out, gives a fresh perspective and hopefully a better one than your own), and truthfully just a sweet record of our family with pictures. I am thankful for this blog and for the creativity it allows. I am also thankful for the connection it's availed to so many other mamas, their creativity and the encouragement I have received from their walks with the Lord.  

Some things I have been embarking upon to add to the blogging outlet have involved reading The Fringe Hours, and this mama's sweet blog The book rocks. I haven't finished it yet, it's more of a slow read, depending on where you are at in life, savoring the chapters. But it was eye opening to see how many of us women think alike and that nasty burden of guilt most of us live under (that's for another post though ;) ). I have also started regularly reading the blogs I have on my side bar, several of them artist mamas learning to balance life, family while still being creative. They are embracing how God has made them, using the gifts He has given them. Mostly, what I have gleaned from these past few months is learning  that it is okay to spend some time creating, I need to be intentional in making the time for it, whatever I create is not going to be perfect (so just do it!), and actually acknowledging that it is something that makes my soul happy. 

So there you have it. Create. Use what God has given you for the main purpose of His glory, not man's. If you end up benefitting financially or some other earthly way, awesome! As long as it is for His glory, then He will use it for what He wants, whether it's just for a filling in your heart or for the benefit of others. :)

Happy and blessed Sunday to you! I am so thankful to have today off, to be able to spend time with our family, go to church, plus have lunch with some of hubby's family and their five wee ones (they were diligent in gently mentoring us as newlyweds and baby Christians) and later, a visit with my cousin, his wife and their sweet little girl.

To God be the glory.

The Lord is not slow to fulfill his promise as some count slowness, but is patient toward you, not wishing that any should perish, but that all should reach repentance.

2 Peter 3:9 ESV

Being a wife and mom...

Yes, randomness for the pictures. Some funny, mostly older but the sweetest memories of daily life through the ups and downs. It is because of this man and these five precious boys the Lord has blessed us with that I can be called "Mom." I say often in my mind that marriage and motherhood is not for the faint hearted. It is a gathering of sinful people trying to work together and love each other more than themselves. It is a process of humility, constant grace, forgiveness, courage and learning of the true meaning of love...something only done through Christ.

I love these six people madly. They teach me daily. They show me Christ daily. Our days are not fuzzy and sugar coated but they are real and full, most times with joy, but some with tears and disappointments. It is here I cling to Christ, to His Word and His mercies being new every morning. We live, we love, we forgive, we extend grace, we pray, we do over, we laugh, we breathe.

Thank you, Father, for blessing me with the privilege of being a wife and mom.

For you formed my inward parts; you knitted me together in my mother's womb. I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well.

Psalm 139:13-14 ESV 

'tis the season...

So I'm not going to lie...this is how I have been feeling lately. I truly love Christmas time, first and foremost for the unbelievable gift of Jesus as my Savior. And then in celebrating Him, the traditions of the season- baking, parties, the music, gift giving...the kindness that tends to linger in the air more so than usual. However, this year has been a bit harder, and though I am struggling with trying not to lose the joy, I am actually finding the true joy of Christmas. It has been a year and half since our big move and then three mini moves since then. With that we have prayed earnestly for work and our needs have been met but definitely not the way we had expected or hoped for, leaving us still praying earnestly. So as I have entered the stores here and there and accept that I cannot buy the gifts I want to for others, the blessing has been in realizing...it's okay not to. And in all of this...He is with me. God is faithful and I will not lose hope. I will continue to pray earnestly, thanking Him for every thing He has blessed us with. His ways are not our ways (Isaiah 55:8), He gives not as the world gives (John 14:27) and I am so thankful. We are clinging to this peace and the joy He gives. How good our God is: patient, kind, merciful and abounding in love. 

L O V E... 

G R A T I T U D E...

J O Y...

P E A C E...

"As the Father has loved me, so have I loved you. Abide in my love."~ John 15:9

So this is how I am trying to take each day, with silliness and joy :) Jesus paid the ultimate price for my life and yours...and though there may be times of weeping and frustration, joy comes in the morning (Psalm 30:5).

How is your Christmas season? Are you finding rest and joy in His word and in His faithfulness? Praying you are...

Day 14 intentionally-Joy! He is risen!

But he was pierced for our transgressions; he was crushed for our iniquities;

upon him was the chastisement that brought us peace,

and with his wounds we are healed.

All we like sheep have gone astray; we have turned—every one—to his own way; 

and the Lord has laid on him the iniquity of us all.Isaiah 53:5-6 ESV

A blessed Easter to you.  Celebrating our Savior, Jesus Christ.

31 Days Intentional - Day 7

From a facebook post from Above Rubies,
"Are you discouraged today with yourself? Are you failing your own personal standards of conduct, and letting yourself down? Well, I have truly great news for you. Today, you are only a shadow of the person you are to become! You are under construction, just as is any building project, and you are making progress every day. In fact, the simple realization that you are unhappy with some of what you see in yourself is proof that you are changing and growing. Is that not great news? Do not give up, as growing to completion takes time, and patience. Recall Phil 1:6, that "Being confident of this very thing, that he which hath begun a good work in you will perform it (carry it on to completion) until the day of Jesus Christ:" Isn't that amazing? We are all under construction, being built up better and better, stronger and stronger, wiser and wiser, with each passing day, month and year. Even a baby takes 9 months to be born, and then begin its dependent life as it matures into self-sufficiency. We are growing more and more into His likeness all the time. This is worth celebrating! Love Michelle+1 (confirmed by ultrasound)"

These words were written for me today...and from the comments on the post, for many other women.
It's a hard job being being a mama and a wife.  When we had our second child it was a hard transition.  The third and fourth children fell right into place.  The fifth... is a bit like the second.

I'm finding myself constantly "trying to catch up."  I am home majority of the time now, working only a few hours a week-a huge change from the full time schedule of the past year.  This is a blessing and answer to prayer!  However, I now find myself looking at the things I've neglected in our home for so long.  This summer hubby had us do a HUGE purge of the house.  Bags upon bags of clothes, toys, books, fabric and "stuff" left our house!  It was wonderful!  But there is still "stuff" here and it is making me a bit crazy.  Right now there are piles in the crib, on the dresser, on a tote next to me, clothes in the hallway and on the couch for sorting and piles of papers for filing.  Does anyone else have piles?  Yes, I confess... I'm a pileler (definition: a habitual pile maker...and yes, I am now making up my own words.  I'm a homeschooler-we can do these things...right? ;) )  But these piles stare at me because I start them and then meals need to be made and stories need to be read and babies need to be fed and laundry needs to be done and math tests need to be checked, and, and...and then the piles are still there but it's bedtime and it's time with my precious husband and those piles are still there...day after day.  Ugh.  Have I stressed you out yet?

Sigh...

So we must pick our battles.  Maybe now is not the time to try and sell unwanted items, but to just donate them.  Maybe now is not the time to have a craft area or to learn how to knit.  Maybe now is not the time to try and be supermom with homemade everything or the perfect blog.

Maybe now is the time for baby steps, like having clean bathrooms and being okay to "just throw it away" instead of saving/salvaging it for that awesome craft etc.

Accepting who I am and loving this precious family.  Making sure my priorities are in order:  quiet time and prayer with the Lord, then hubby, kids, school and home.  But not looking at these things as something to check off a to do list.  I'm constantly trying to get it all done.  Just writing that looks ridiculous! It is time to be in the now and find JOY in the things that need to be done...because the "need to be done" things...are gifts.  Gifts not to be taken advantage of.  These gifts are blessings and not hindrances.  Lord, forgive me for an ungrateful heart.

Tomorrow is Thanksgiving.  I have much to be grateful for.  Right here and right now.  The piles of laundry, the dishes, the diapers...they are here for a season but for a lasting purpose and I pray the fruit of my attitude towards all of it would bring glory to my Father.

And the best news...I'm not on my own trying to do this.  "I can do all things through him who strengthens me." (Philippians 4:13)  When I lose sight and try and do it on my own is when it all comes crashing down.

Our God is good.

...and would I want to miss this? ;)

Praying for a grateful heart and finding joy in where you're at.

“[Thanksgiving] I give thanks to my God always for you because of the grace of God that was given you in Christ Jesus, that in every way you were enriched in him in all speech and all knowledge—” 1 Corinthians 1:4-5 ESV

***posted a couple days late :)